So, back to Jennifer. What did I tell my two year-old when she announced that she needed to check on her boys? I chuckled to myself and told her to go do it. I knew that the reality was she would go see what the boys were up to, but she didnʼt have the authority to effect any sort of change in their behavior if they were not behaving. And really, thatʼs what I just said about our church brethren too, isnʼt it? Iʼm in no position of authority to effect a change in their beliefs or relationship with God. If I send Jennifer to tell them to stop jumping on the bed, then she becomes a tool, carrying responsibility, but itʼs only responsibility that Iʼve given her. Similarly, if God moves me to talk with my brothers and/or sisters, I can carry Godʼs authority as expressed in the Bible. But it is God who brings us to repentance.
I was busy doing something “the other day”. Jonathan and Christopher were upstairs, playing trains. Jennifer, my then two-year-old, was following me around, chattering. Suddenly, she announced, “I have to go check on my boys; they canʼt be upstairs by themselves.” I laughed. How cute she is! But it suddenly struck me how frequently we do that! Consciously or sub-consciously we say, “Father, we canʼt leave George alone! I need to go check on him. ”Now, I am in no way saying that we shouldnʼt visit our brothers and sisters in Christ - just to visit, to encourage. What I am underlining is that feeling of superiority and authority that only two-year olds get towards their older siblings. At least, it is only two year-olds, isnʼt it? We, as adults, as Christians, we would never adopt an attitude of superiority or authority towards another of Godʼs children, would we? Unfortunately, I think we do - all too often. Some years ago, our church split into several pieces. It was a strange event because we all like each other as people; we just disagree strongly in some doctrinal areas. Because I care about these people, I have been anxious about them. Without our stabilizing influence, whatʼs to prevent them from going further off into what I consider dangerous, heretical beliefs? Thereʼs a difficult line here. We, all of us, believe that what we believe is correct. We have scriptures to backup our positions. Yet sometimes those with whom we fellowship hold another view. Hopefully the love between us is such that we can share what we believe, gently. But once weʼve made our position known, as clearly as we can, if they are not willing to hear us, then what can we do? We have to trust that God is completely able to bring a prodigal back to Him in His time. But what if they, the ones whoʼve separated from us, are not wrong? What if weʼre the ones who are diverging from the Truth? Unfortunately, thatʼs the uncomfortable definition of being deceived. You can't be deceived if you know itʼs wrong. It is Satanʼs goal to deceive us - to draw us away from communion with our Father. So, although it is good and right to be concerned about the spiritual and physical welfare of our brothers and sisters in Christ, it must be done in love and humility, not in superiority and arrogance.
So, back to Jennifer. What did I tell my two year-old when she announced that she needed to check on her boys? I chuckled to myself and told her to go do it. I knew that the reality was she would go see what the boys were up to, but she didnʼt have the authority to effect any sort of change in their behavior if they were not behaving. And really, thatʼs what I just said about our church brethren too, isnʼt it? Iʼm in no position of authority to effect a change in their beliefs or relationship with God. If I send Jennifer to tell them to stop jumping on the bed, then she becomes a tool, carrying responsibility, but itʼs only responsibility that Iʼve given her. Similarly, if God moves me to talk with my brothers and/or sisters, I can carry Godʼs authority as expressed in the Bible. But it is God who brings us to repentance.
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We were packing the van, getting ready to leave for the Feast of Tabernacles. The kids were dressed, waiting, bouncing off the walls, excited. They asked if they could go outside while I loaded the van and Daddy tied their bicycles on the top. I said yes, but sternly warned them not to get dirty. A few minutes later, I saw Jonathan standing near the teeter-totter swing, watching Jennifer pull dirt off the seat onto her white shirt, spilling the fine dust down her pants and all over her shoes. I lost it. I yelled. I marched over and told Jonathan to get himself and his siter into the house to wash their hands, all the while slapping at my 2-year-old, trying to salvage Jenniferʼs outfit. Then I swatted both of them. Jonathan started sobbing, but he took Jennifer inside.Christopher crept up to me and said, “Mommy . . .?” I rather ignored him and continued packing. He persisted. “Mommy?” he quietly said, “It was me. I put the dirt on the seat. Then I stood back and asked Jennifer if she wanted to knock it off."
Oh. "You mean Jonathan didnʼt have anything to do with it.” “Right.” Oh. How often do I jump into a situation with both feet, guns blazing - only to find that I didnʼt have all of the information? I am not God. I am not omniscient, omnipresent, or all wise. I don't know what it is - is it the daily responsibility of being the one in charge of three intelligent, energetic children? Is it that I somehow unconsciously start to identify my role as parent with the role of my Heavenly Parent? Why is it that I act without knowledge? Even my Heavenly Parent, who does know all things is slow to anger and abounds in patience. Christopher was a very clear mirror. I apologized toJonathan and asked his forgiveness. But God ʼ s not donewith me yet; I suspect there will be other opportunities toshow me that He alone is God. Not too long ago, but in reality several years ago, I was talking about giving a tithe and other freewill offerings to God. Jonathan wanted to know why we didnʼt give everything, and he meant everything, to God. I told him that God doesnʼt need our money, and it really doesnʼt bring God glory to have us give everything away and become street people, a burden for someone else .“What about,” Jonathan persisted, “the widow who gave all she had?” Although mentally Jonathan put up a huge stop sign for me, I elaborated on how we can use the talents God has given us, put our money to work so that more people are exposed to the truth of Christ than if we gave everything away and then had to rely on someone else to meet our needs. He walked away satisfied, I think, but I was left with questions. Does God want me to give everything away? Do I trust Him to meet my needs if I did? Would I really be willing to give up everything if I knew that was Godʼs will for me? Or am I too comfortable where I am now? Am I trusting in material things and the deceitfulness of riches? What about the widow and her mite? Jesus commended her!!
Weeks later, I put the whole thing into a different frame, and at once became much more comfortable -and uneasy simultaneously. What I told Jonathan is true: God does not need our money. And even if we gave Him all of it, and all of our material possessions, thatʼ s not really what Heʼ s after. Our loving Heavenly Father wants us to willingly give Him our lives, our allegiance, our wills, our hearts. He wants us to take every thought captive to Jesus Christ. He wants us to live our lives with a heart that submits to Him as Lord and Master - in everything. Thatʼs our widowʼs mite. Without Jesus Christ, we are poor and wretched and blind. She gave, in her poverty, everything. We, in our poverty, must give all that we are to Jesus Christ. And, you know what? Itʼs an every day offering, not just a one-time commitment at baptism. You see, the less we have of Christ, the more destitute we are. Conversely, the more Christ fills our lives, the more we owe Him. It does not mean, either, that we sigh a breath of relief that we donʼt have to give God all of our material wealth. For truly, if you are in complete submission to His will, if youʼve willingly put all that you have and are into His hands, then you will use all of your material possessions to His glory, for His service, no matter where He leads you. What we have is not ours; itʼs all a gift from God. Weʼre merely stewards and caretakers. Do you realize why I said I felt at once much more comfortable - and simultaneously uneasy? While at once knowing that God doesnʼt expect me to give up all of His gifts, He really wants all of me, which includes being willing to give up those gifts. It is so hard to submit my will to my Lord. I want to be in charge. Jennifer taught me an important when she was in the early
stages of potty training. When hers was wet, she would bring a clean diaper to me so I could change her. And frequently, when I’d removed her diaper, she would insist that she had to go to the bathroom NOW. So I let her go, bare-bottomed, to the potty. She would sit down momentarily, and then come running back to me, clapping her hands and loudly proclaiming, “I did it, I did it.” Ninety-nine percent of the time, the potty was still clean. She did this one morning when Ron was home. He turned and met my amused eyes with his own. Then he wondered if we do the same thing in God’s eyes. We’re going through the motions, and someday we’re going to understand why, but right now it doesn’t amount to a whole lot. Martin Luther opined that one of the functions of the law is to
ct as a mirror - to show us ourselves and our need for a Savior. But sometimes that mirror is truly as if looking through a glass darkly. The law is misunderstood or misapplied. How ever it happens, it becomes a less effective tool in drawing us closer to our God. Our God has other tools. One of the most enlightening, humbling and encouraging tools our Father has for teaching us about Him and our relationship with the Great God of the Universe, is one of the most precious gifts He has given to us: our children. When Mom and my step-dad married, we three kids were teens. Dad used to say, “Low children are a gift from God” - deliberating misquoting Psalm 127:3 in a humorous attempt to underline the struggles parents and new step-parents have with teens. Then when my husband Ron and I were expecting our first cild, we called Mom and Dad. When each was on an extension, asked them to get out their Bibles and turn to Psalm 127:3. When they had, and we had all laughed about the earlier family joke, I told them that God had decided to give us a gift. I’ll never forget their joy as my inference sunk in. And I never could have imagined the joy Jonathan (our first gift from God), Christopher, and Jennifer would bring to my life - especially as my Heavenly Parent uses them to teach me about Himself and my relationship with Him - and to draw me closer to Him. I want to share some of the things my Father is teaching me, from trusting Him completely to the incredible love He has for me. May you be blessed as you share some of my journey. |
AuthorCynthia Saladin is a homeschooling mom of three, with a passion for teaching them about God and having a personal relationship with him. Archives
November 2023
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